Notice that I use the word “target” rather than “victim” because I personally don’t like the application of the word “victim” in cases like this. I don’t *feel* like a victim. I didn’t feel like a victim when it went down. I felt like the target of ignorance, cowardly hate, and bully-style intimidation tactics. What did the bullies accomplish? It rattled me at the time, but I still followed through with my outing and continued about my business, undeterred. I’m more street-wise for having this happen. It was a good reminder of where society is at (or at least a low-brow segment there of), and a good reminder of real dangers that are out there. Will they stop be from being myself and getting out? Nope. They’ve made me smarter in my approach to being in public.

Video the violators and then obtain counsel and burn their ass for all it’s worth.

This is not designed for personal gain rather for corporations to recoginze individuals rights to expression.

Without litigation in matters such as this, there would be no ADA, Americans with Disabilities Act. This act disallows ridicule, harrasment or discrimination based on disabilities, actual or percieved..

BTW a good USB drive pen cam is less than $50 and can record up to an hour or more.

good luck
Yolanda

That would be cool. Personally I like gorgeous women and gorgeous T-Girls. Beautiful is beautiful in my book =)

I don’t pass in person, at least not to most. That does not make my life unhappy at all though – I love my life and wouldn’t change a thing (at least not about who I am as a person). I wish I could be passable, not only to minimize my chance of being harmed while out in public, but also because I would very much like to appear female and more attractive as such. It is very frustrating that every time I venture out of my house en femme, I literally take my life into my hands, and for the sole reason of the fact that I do not conform to socially accepted genetic gender roles. That’s a bunch of bull – following social opinions or facing potential harm (for not doing so). Bull or not, that is how people like me are generally treated in this area. Not by all, but by too many.

I agree – there are a lot of miserable and confused trans folk out there. I am neither confused or miserable. I once was, but not any longer. It is my hope to help others break free of their misery and confusion as well. I think the world would be a much happier place if people genuinely felt like they could just be themselves rather than feeling the need to conform to what others would have them be. Regardless of what people would have me be, or try to intimidate me into being, I will always choose to be myself. To do any less would return me to the miserable state I once existed in during my years of self-loathing and conformity.

It is not likely that T-Mobile will take any serious action because of my communication with them. My letter represents very little threat to the company. When there is little or no threat to a company’s bottom line, there is no motivation to take any action. Same would be true if one person complained about a company’s product or service and no one seemed to care. If complaining about X does not affect sales, there is no danger to the company in their non-action. That’s just how the business world works. Regardless, that will not stop me from doing what I can to raise attention about problems like this. Perhaps in time, enough people will find it unsettling that such behavior by company representatives is so well tolerated by management, and find it enough reason to do business elsewhere.

To address part of what you wrote to Erin, I have nothing against t-girls who are completely passable. They do not take anything away from me in their passing, nor will I ever look down upon them for their ability to look entirely female. If they behave in an unflattering manner (as in treat others poorly for how they look), then I have a problem, but that is behavior based, and not appearance based. I believe it is true that some may feel threatened by the beauty of others, but that is not unique to the trans-world. Personally, I don’t think it has anything to do with trans or non-trans, but rather the basic emotion of jealousy and the negative manifestations it often brings out in people. I’d love to dive into the “whole people should have the right to appear however they want in public, vs. people who stand out will usually be ridiculed for doing so” argument… but that’s too deep of a topic in itself to get into as part of the T-Mobile discussion.

Personally I am transgendered by definition but not gender dysphoric. I enjoy my gender as much as I do my the gender I more closely identify with. Most people don’t recognize my femininity because of my stature. And it is actually funny, people think of me as very masculine because of my stature. Yet the personality traits that attracts people to me, are all from my very developed femininity.

More to the point. People should have the freedom to wear what makes them feel good. Look how seamlessly crossdressing for women is now in our society. 80 years ago what most women wear daily would not only be frowned on but jail-able offenses. During WWII because of labor demands and the Suffrage Movement eroding strict roles and dress codes women wore jumpsuits to work in the factories. It wasn’t really until Mary Taylor Moore on the Dick VanDyke show that first there was shock and then a greater acceptance of what would have been considered crossdressing 2 generations earlier. Now women can shop in the men’s dept. without a second thought from much of anyone.

That is where men should be. Much of the women’s fashions transgendered people covet are rooted in men’s fashions anyways… but that is a different discussion ;)

You see, while I do *honestly* get taken aback when I see non passing CDs or transwomen, I dont believe they should be faced with violence nor undue slander. However, I can tell you, what you are stating, that blending is not an option, I must disagree.

Now, I am not here to brag nor am I here to make myself sound wonderful, rather, Im just adding an honest perspective from a different view.

Most CDs and even trans women I met appreciate that they can be ‘both’. Now, for myself, since I was 5 years old, I have *known* I was a girl. I didn’t feel like one, I *knew* I was one. I always would think ‘by the time Im an adult, they’ll have a way figured out to fix this.’ I spent a long 20 year period not mentioning anything really until I told my family.

Shock occurred, as expected, and then slowly changed to acceptance. However, even my own parents were concerned. I sat them down and explained I am *not* represented by any culture really, not trans or otherwise. I have no affinity for being a male, although I am a tomboy of sorts, and for me, I was and will always be a genetic woman, just born incorrectly.

For me, blending IS an option. I began living full time when I had hair not even an inch long, in hopes that I could get over my own worries and vanities, assuming I’d never pass. Now, just a lil under a year later, I cant go out alone cause I get hit on, and no one is the wiser (even sometimes Im taken as if Im joking when I tell them Im not a genetic woman.)

However, I *am* the same as any genetic woman. I understand most trans people feel like women, but its not as simple as that, and I understand and totally accept it, I cant imagine how hard that is, since, for me personally, my issues are quite simple and once I began to pass, my life stopped being so focused on myself and my inability to fit in.

My point here is, the community *does* seem to resent those who pass seamlessly. When I was beginning therapy last spring, I agreed to group sessions, if only because I felt a tad intolerant to others. Im glad i went because I realized Im not intolerant, I just hate that people wont accept Im different from them, that for me, blending was always the goal. I am not trans, nor do I really share any of the views the GLBT or trans community holds. It doesnt mean I dont support them, it just means I dont agree with alot of what they are for.

That said, all these women, save the two who were quite sweet, but older, HATED me. When I spoke, they rolled their eyes cause my voice sounds like a woman. When I would wear anything attractive, like if I came after work, I used to work for New York & Company, they would just stare in disgust at me.

The irony here is, they didnt stare because I looked odd, they stared because they felt I passed *too* well, and since I lived in stealth, that I was doing the community a disservice. The fact is, Im not trans, Im just like any other genetic woman, and thank the Lord, I’ve been blessed to pass quite easily and consistently, allowing me the normal life as a woman I would have otherwise not had. However, like I said, every trans person I know, save the VERY few like myself, believe that I am *hurting* the community. *Why* should we have to disclose we were born men? Does Jaime Lee Curtis openly admit she was born a hermaphrodite?! lol Of course not! Because a woman is a woman, and that is it. I understand and am ok with the variance that people live in between men and women, but for me, I’ve always just been the girl next door.

So, while I sympathize for those who dont pass, and will fight for their right to equality, there is a difference between normal women and, like you said, drag queens. I am honestly annoyed by those types and prefer to avoid their company, but only because they tend to be loud, over the top, and completely oversexual in their actions. Its kind like how you dont wear a wife beater to a fancy restaurant without getting looks. If you’re being loud nd dressed like a vegas showgirl at your local grocier, you’re a fool if you think you won’t cause a stir.

In the end, I feel awful for those who ARE just trying to fit in, but due to physical structure, or otherwise, they cannot pass. Those are the people my heart goes out to each day, because I cant imagine how awful that must be, and it certainly gives me alot to be thankful for. However, I just dont understand the hypocrisy. CDs and TS people who dont pass dont want guff for not passing, yet they give people like me guff for passing too well. I just dont understand why they insist the girls who pass and are just simple women stand on ‘their side.’ For myself and others like me, it isnt about sides anymore, we’re just your average woman looking for a job, a life, and for some, a love. :)