I will definitely work on my appearance, including the CD aspect. It is fun.

I think more guys would enjoy it as well, if they gave it a try. Of course, that would only work if they were not so cowardly about what “others might think” and afraid of being ridiculed themselves. No one wants the social stigma that comes along for the ride in this “macho rules” society. In their defense, I can’t say I blame them for that feeling, but I will blame them for behaving poorly about the topic when they do.

In terms of your “negative statement”… you should see the terrible things people say to me, and with greater frequency. I get called names, told I will burn in hell, death wished upon me, and just plain lashed out at (sometimes by other transgender folk) in aggressive and belligerent ways. I do not publish hate comments, nor comments in which people lash out senselessly. For the record, I do feed off the energy they offer me so freely. It doesn’t get me down, but rather let me know I’m doing something right. ;)

I hope you will choose to keep your photos on flickr… at least until you find another online home for them. :)

NOTE: For those curious as to why Phythos’s flickr photos require you to log into flicker to view, trust me – they’re quite safe and not vulgar or sexually explicit. I think a couple of them may have fallen in a gray area of violating flickr’s (unpublished) guidelines and that is probably why they are categorized as they are. I’d encourage you to at least give them a quick browse and make up your own mind in that regard.

But It did seemed strange seeing me in clothing I do wear as a male, but for the pics done is a Very feminine manner. I have to admit, going all the way opposed to the androgynous look I usually do was quite fun. It is almost an art form.

My honest feeling is, if more guys tried it, they would also like it.

I have since gotten many compliments, with some from guys who thought I was female (?). My transgendered friend said I had an exotic look to myself, which I find appealing, to hear.

I also got one negative statement from some guy calling himself Fireman…something. He said “WTF? Yuck”. Such a nice thing to say.

But all the others have been nice.

I guess I should post the link.
http://www.flickr.com/photos/29482148@N05/

It may be gone soon though, due to some bigotry taking place at Flickr.

What I really want to do is get some shots with me posing by my plane, now that would be fun.

Perhaps a part of you wants to be recognized in your photos in an effort to test whether or not you will find acceptance in whoever discovers your photos. I think people inherently have a need or desire to know how others think of us (as in those we see day to day). In keeping secret such a significant aspect of one’s being, one can never really know how others feel about them.

I’ve been slowly coming out to people I know and it has been mostly positive and very liberating. Perhaps in time, you will find what you are looking for on that fate-tempting level in doing the same. If/when it is right for you.

I don’t have any childhood CD experiences, so I’m going through an accelerated adult process, I guess. Posting my first photos was as much liberating as it was scary, but I was wearing a wig and a lot of makeup, and I carefully disguised any background that might be familiar. Trouble was, there was also a part of me that looked at those photos and didn’t see myself either. In fact, I would scour the photos and eliminate those where I looked too much like myself.

This didn’t really sit well with the gurl inside, though.

Over time – not that long, actually – I have made changes to my physical self (nothing artifical, though) so that I appear more feminine and don’t need a disguise. So, I dropped the wig, cut back on the makeup and can now feel that the photos have more truth in them, if you know what I mean.

Of course, now if anyone I know sees my photos, I will be instantly recognized, which is a brand new fear. As awful as that prospect is, sometimes I wonder if I am purposely tempting fate.

My photos are at http://www.flickr.com/cdjanie

Erin: Never be ashamed of cleavage;)

Your girlfriend sounds like a keeper in my book. :) I have high respect and admiration for women who are accepting and supportive of their trans-partners. Please send my love and best wishes to yours.

I’m so happy you enjoy my offerings here, Erin. :) Hopefully, I’ll be able to keep it going for a long time to come. It’s important to show the world we’re good people and live our lives without shame about who we are. Thank you for your continued participation and for having the courage to be yourself. I have much respect for my trans-sisters who accept this aspect of their lives and put forth a positive show.