Category Archives: rants

“One of Your Faggot Friends”

"That's a dude, ain't he?"

Earlier this week while I was at work, “Edmund” (not his real name) stopped by to visit my wife. I know Edmund fairly well. We didn’t always get along, but as he grew up and matured, things lightened up between us. He’s really not a bad guy, but he offered a little reminder and rather cold dose of reality before his visit was through.
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Thank You For Noticing I’m Normal

the "normal" Cleaver family eating their "normal" dinner

What exactly is normal? Being a crossdresser, most of society would consider me to be anything but normal. Sadly, that assessment is entirely based on my preferred choice of outward appearance. Compared to the Cleaver family of 1950’s sitcom “everyday normal family” fame, do I really look so terrible?

We live in a society that preaches “don’t judge a book by its cover” and tells us diversity is a good thing, but there are widely accepted limits to both. I’m not sure exactly where the line is drawn, but it falls well short of accepting someone like me as “normal”.
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Crossdressing Myth #5: It is a Destructive Addiction

crossdressing myths

A lot of people seem to think that crossdressing is an addiction because most crossdressers cannot stop crossdressing even if they tried. Sadly, there is a good number of crossdressers who feel that their own crossdressing is a terrible addiction they need to rid themselves of. We all grow up learning about how “wrong” crossdressing is. It’s driven into our heads repeatedly throughout our lives.

Myth: Crossdressing is an addiction like alcoholism or any other drug dependency that must be overcome. Fact: Although crossdressing may be addictive to some, crossdressing itself is not an addiction, but rather a personal trait like being right or left handed.
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HE Turned Out to be a SHE

cable van

The cable guy made a house call at the Hermosa household recently. When he spoke to greet me, I realized immediately that the gable guy was really the cable gal. My wife and I both mistook her for a him. Honestly, she really did look more like a him than a her. Just to be clear, I’m not picking on her appearance in any way, shape, or form – only indicating that she looked male based on her physical appearance alone. The point I’m getting to is how society is very accepting of women who dress and look masculine in appearance. Society is not accepting of men who dress and look feminine in appearance. Why does this only work one way and not the other?
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Crossdressing Myth #4: It Is a Mental Illness

crossdressing myths

“A man dressed up like a woman?? Why… he MUST be crazy! This man needs help! He should be institutionalized! Hurry – get him off the street before anyone else catches this terrible mental disease!” Oh please. This attitude and severe lack of knowledge is so pre-1950’s. Crossdressing is a mental illness, babies come from storks, and the world is flat, right?

Myth: Crossdressers are mentally ill and that is why they have the urge to crossdress. Fact: Although it is possible for a mentally ill person to also be a crossdresser, crossdressing is not the result of a mental illness, but rather one of many personal traits that some people have genetically woven into them. This particular trait just happens to be widely misunderstood and have a social stigma attached to it.
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Crossdressing Myth #3: Crossdressers are Perverts

crossdressing myths

Although not the number 1 cliché, this idiotic myth is probably the most damaging to crossdressers than any of the other myths combined. This one alone plays a significant role in society’s general unacceptance of us. Myth: crossdressers are perverts. Fact: Most crossdressers are certainly NOT perverts, but rather regular guys who have a strong feminine side. Only a small percentage of crossdressers are perverts. It is probably proportionate to the number of non-crossdressers who are perverts.

I’m not exactly sure how this myth originated in terms of what line of thinking was involved. It is probably due to many factors, from general misunderstandings blown out of proportion to things that are completely just made up. I’d like to explore a few possibilities that may have lead to this terrible assessment of crossdressers.
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When Did “Sexy” Become “Slutty” and Why?

[Not a valid template]Do you remember the sexy styles from the late 80’s and early 90’s? Miniskirts, low-cut tops, and form-fitting clothes that revealed plenty of skin were in style and plenty of lovely ladies were working it. How I loved to see attractive women wearing these fashions and wished I could do the same. My wife dressed in these sexy styles very frequently when we first started dating.

Unfortunately, many of these sexy styles gave way to far more conservative fashions. Somehow “sexy” became almost synonymous with “slutty”. This is especially problematic for me because I really love dressing sexy. To the right there is an example of how I like to dress. I really love that outfit. It’s comfortable, I look good in it, and feel absolutely great about myself when I dress that way.

So how exactly did attractively “sexy” become cheap and “slutty”? There seems to be this notion that if a woman dresses too sexy, that she’s just trying to get guys horny, or she’s a slut, or prostitute. There’s a shame factor in dressing too sexy now. Why is that? Who cheapened sexy to slutty? Was it the fashion industry just wanting to sell more conservative styles? Was it insecure women constantly putting down other women who they felt looked better than they did by calling them sluts and whores? What happened?
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