Category Archives: mental health

Dear Gabi, I’m a Young Crossdresser Confused About My Sexual Orientation

Dear Gabi,

I’ve just recently discovered your website and wish I would have earlier in my exploration of crossdressing. ;) I’m 18 now and have accepted who I am, been dressing up since I was young, 5 or 6. I’ve come to terms with a lot of stuff, and I’m no longer ashamed of who I am. I have a loving girlfriend for almost a year now who knows everything as well, she is very accepting and supportive =)

My problem deals with my sexual orientation, I know I’m attracted to girls, thus my girlfriend, but while dressed, I find I’m always craving guys, so for a while I just thought I was bisexual, until when I was 16 had my first relationship and sexual experience with a guy. Now he was a full time crossdresser, even during high school, I think that was the main attraction. I was so turned on being with him, and kissing him. Anything to do with touching or seeing his genitals didn’t turn me off, but didn’t turn me on. I love the feeling of anal sex (from a male), turns me on immensely.

So basically I’m kind of confused, I look at a normal guy and I’m not turned on, but I always find myself thinking about having sex with a male and strap-ons with my girlfriend just doesn’t feel the same. I know it’s a vague question as well, I’m still young and exploring and advice would be amazing :)


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Dear Gabi, My Crossdressing Honey Feels Like a Freak

Dear Gabi,

Three years ago, I hooked up with my (yes, this is a cliche) High School SWEETHEART. We’re both in our late 40’s… divorced… kids… yawn yawn blah blah. He came out to me about 9 months after we re-initiated our relationship. He’s a cross dresser. Her name is Kelly. I am all for it. No problem. Be what makes you happy. Life is short. But it doesn’t always make him/her happy. He thinks he’s a freak. His ex never knew this about him. He’s known his whole life. What can I do to convince him that all is good… I love “them” the way they are. It’s now been 3 years. I moved from California to Michigan during an American financial crisis for “f” sake. I love him. Have since I was 14. I come from the land of fruits and nuts. I refuse to judge anyone… EVER!! Living in this closed minded world I have found Michigan to be is not an easy transition, so I understand his trepidation. HELP!! The people here have stunted his mental growth! He fights with me. When he’s Kelly… all is good until something (ie the door bell rings) sets him off. He becomes paranoid and rips away Kelly faster than you can sneeze. Then proceeds to be depressed for days! I have his back! He’s not alone anymore. What more can I do??


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Dear Gabi, What Should I Expect From Therapy?

Dear Gabi,

I have just approached a therapist about some sessions as I feel my crossdressing is starting to effect my relationship. My girlfriend is understanding in a way but is still not overly keen.

It is just me who will be attending, as we both feel there are issues I need to address which could all be linked. Short temper for no apparent reason like I get really mad about the most silly things. My girlfriend thinks it’s always before I need to dress. She does not want to see me dressed though. I think I need to get a good understanding of why I need to dress other than “I love that dress!!”. I feel I’m rambling on a bit so apologies for that. I don’t wish for it to go any further than our home but I don’t want to always be alone when dressed but not sure she will ever want to get involved.

I just wondered what is the main objective of this type of therapy. I am nervous and not sure what to expect.

Best regards,

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Dear Gabi, Discovered by Wife… HELP!

Dear Gabi,

Thanks for your page, I will be back to visit. I have dressed off/on since 5 years old. In an off phase went dated and married.

Had gotten back into and understand and accept now that it is part of me and great stress relief. Almost cost me my job due to poor reaction to stress.

I was trying to decide how to talk with my wife about it and left a journal site open. Now she knows before I was quite ready. I have seen your How to Tell Your Wife You’re a Crossdresser page but am looking for any other help tips there might be. If you have any, thanks.

I haven’t looked at everything here but your en femme pictures are awesome, you make very nice looking woman. If I can get half as cute as you I will be happy.

Good luck and enjoy in the future.


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Happy 2010 and New Year’s Resolutions

Happy New Year 2010! I hope everyone enjoyed a safe and festive evening full of fun and laughter, among good friends and family.

The Mrs. and I were pretty low-key last night. It was just the two of us with no real plans for the evening. We enjoyed some TV together (a bit of Dexter season 3 on DVD) and took it easy. The fabulous Mrs. H. wasn’t feeling so fabulous (due to a visit from her monthly friend) and fell asleep well before midnight. I woke her with a gentle kiss and wished her a happy new year just before calling it a night and joining her.

Following the long standing tradition, many people will make new year’s resolutions with good intent, only to give up after a short period of trying. There are some very important resolutions I made this year. I pray that I have the strength to follow through with them.
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Vlog #2: Overeating, Exercising, and a Wii Bit of Racing

This is entry number 2 in my vlog (video blog) series. It’s been just over a month since my last vlog, so I thought it was about time.

In this installment, I talk about a personal struggle that’s been causing trouble in my life. A recent session with my therapist shed some light on a destructive obsessive cycle that’s been spiraling out of control for a few months now.
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Visiting My Therapist En Femme

metal handsMy reasons for being in therapy are not directly centered around being a crossdresser, although is often brought up as it ties into to many aspects of my life. If being a part time t-girl is not the main reason for being in therapy, then why go to my therapist en femme? The short answer is why not? I’ve been making a point to stretch my legs and get out in public as Gabrielle, and this seemed like another great opportunity to do so.

I’ve shown my therapist photos of Gabrielle a few times. In recent sessions, it’s felt like things may be winding down. I wanted him to meet Gabrielle in person before we parted ways. Without being asked to or making it known ahead of time, I decided to just show up as Gabrielle. This particular session took place a few weeks ago – I’m a little behind in my writing. Coincidentally, I have another session with him today, although I’ll be going as plain old Gabe and not Gabrielle.

Here we go again
So what happens in the reception area before even having a seat in the waiting room? I get laughed at… again. To date, my record is perfect – every time I’ve ventured out into public and interacted with people as Gabrielle, I’ve gotten laughed at. As it’s been mentioned before, I do not pass in person.
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